About Coach Jack e-mail
Jack and Toshie Ito

Books and Help from Coach Jack Ito PhD

Dr. Jack Ito's Book

What to Do When He Won't Change

connecting through yes book

Connecting Through “Yes!”


build love with communication

Building Love through Better Communication: 5 Free Lessons for Women


communication e-book

Back in the Picture: The Man's Guide to Better Communication in Marriage and Committed Relationships

How are your relationship skills? Take this self-assessment and find out.

Just one key relationship skill can hold you back in your relationships. That's why relationship coaching is so helpful for having closer, more intimate relationships.

Check the boxes that are TRUE for you. Every skill has some major benefit for you.

acceptance --I see clearly what is going on and deal with that rather than continuing to use methods that don't work.

assertiveness --I know how to express my needs clearly without being bossy.

balancing family and career--I manage my time well and my family as well as my coworkers look forward to seeing me walk in the door.

boundaries --I quickly put an end to harmful behaviors my partner is doing.

communication --I communicate in a way that increases understanding, promotes closeness, and makes my partner want to communicate with me more in the future.

coping with others' emotions--I know how to handle my partner's strong emotions such as anger, anxiety, frustration, and sadness..

cultural differences --I know how to resolve cultural, religious, and values differences in my relationship.

dating --my partner really looks forward to our dates

decision making --I have structured methods for making good decisions

family relationships --I am comfortable dealing with all members of my family

finances --my financial situation is getting better and better. Working on finances with my partner goes smoothly.

finding the right partner -- I know how to find and attract the right partner for me.

fun --There are no obstacles to my happiness. I enjoy life as it comes.

goal setting for couples --My partner and I work together on our future and it is making us a very close couple.

goal setting for individuals --I don't depend on my partner for my happiness. I create happiness with my life that I share with my partner. Neediness is a thing of the past.

growth --my life is getting better and better.

home --I really feel comfortable and "at home" in my home.

environment --I am confident in all of the social situations in my life at home, work, and elsewhere.

intimacy --The way I interact with my partner keeps us close.

knowledge --I know all I need to know to reach the next step for all my goals for myself and for my relationship.

learning --My partner and I continue to learn about each other, accept each other, and live as One.

life purpose --No matter what happens to me, my life is meaningful and I am thankful.

managing time --I prioritize my time and am careful to use it in a way that makes my future better.

new beginnings --I have left my "baggage" in the past. Each day is a new day and I have a lot to do that I like to do.

overcoming fears --When I have fears, I know how to put them to good use rather than let them ruin my day or affect my relationships.

prioritizing --The way I am living my life, I am not likely to have any regrets in the future.

problem resolution --Problems are a part of life, but I know how to resolve them. I always have solutions and back-up solutions for solving my problems.

relocations --When I move, I know how to make new friends and adjust.

restoring love --I know how to re-start the fire. I know how to create desire for me in my partner, even after things have gone badly.

revitalizing long term relationships --I recognize that routine can lead to relationship dissatisfaction and introduce new and stimulating changes in my relationship.

sex --I feel so connected to my partner during sex. We both look forward to it regularly. It's easy for us to tell each other what we want sexually.

sharing --I don't need to hide things from my partner. We comfortably share our lives and thoughts with each other.

social relationships --I focus on others, and am not self-conscious about making new friends.

spiritual differences --I know that everyone has spiritual differences, and feel free to have my beliefs and am accepting of my partner's.

transforming arguments --Whenever arguments happen, I quickly use a structured approach to bring us back together, to deal with the issue, and to become closer.

values clarification --I know what I want and need and what my partner wants and needs.

visualization--I know just how I want my life to be 1 year, 5 years, and 10 years from now, and am on the path to making that happen.

As your relationship coach, I will help you to work on what you need most for a great relationship. Unlike counseling, coaches don't just sit back and listen. I will be actively involved with you each step of the way—helping you to generate ideas, learn skills, stay active and on track, and to identify self-defeating patterns and beliefs. You will stop settling for what you get in life and instead create the life you want. Life is too short to do anything else.

Coaching Packages

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